Friday, July 23, 2010

I was on Fire…

One of the guys in the third shift grocery department was regaling me in tales of various customers early this morning on one of my in store wandering breaks.

“We have this one old lady that comes in at 6am once a week for milk,” he said. “She will go through every gallon until she finds the milk with the longest expiration date often taking 30 minutes to do so.  I call her the milk maid like in that Kevin Smith movie Clerks.”

I smiled.  I could imagine a steadfast little lady studiously going through all the milk to find the best expiration offering.  Just one of those idiosyncrasies you deal with in retail. 

“The produce handlers are the worst,” he said as he began to smile and laugh.  “They will handle and punch the fruit trying to find the ripest ones.  They end up bruising and ruining a lot of our produce.”

Work was very busy when I arrived at five AM.  I clocked in and sleepily began to gather all the haphazardly scattered carts into long strings to be pushed inside by the mechanical pusher.  It was so nice and cool this morning belying the heat I would often experience around ten in the morning as the sun got higher in the sky on my previous shift.

It took me two hours to get caught up and daylight was just showing over the horizon to the east.  I headed back to the electronics department to hang out until my supervisor arrived at work.  Kim wouldn’t be into work until eight.  I was missing her.  I spent my time looking at the big screen LCD televisions daydreaming about one day purchasing one of the monstrosities on display. If I can ever justify spending $1500 dollars on a TV.  That’s a lot of carts to push and yards to mow. 

My supervisor finally arrived at eight and I was eager to share with her about how the morning went.  She was in a very good mood – very chipper.  

“Cart’s were everywhere when I arrived,” I told her. “It took me two hours to get caught up.”

“How did you like your first early morning?” she asked after thanking me for my hard work.

“I love it!” I replied excitedly. “I am a morning person anyway.  I like the wee hours of the morning the best.”

“I knew I could trust you to do a good job for me,” she told me.

I beamed with pride. I always like it when she brags on me.  It makes me feel like a million dollars. 

Kim had also arrived at eight.  I quickly left my supervisor eating some sausage biscuits from McDonald’s and headed back to her department.

“Hey gorgeous,” I said as I walked up to her counter.

She looked so pretty today.  Dressed in a blue shirt which showed ample cleavage and beige pants.  Those myriad of rings around her fingers as usual.  Her chubby little Drew Barrymore smile was on her face as always.  Kim is always smiling.  She also had on a beautiful necklace from which a blue butterfly was dangling – butterflies being her favorite thing just like the tattoo of one on her shoulder.  I could smell her subdued perfume from across the counter.

“You and me. Tonight,” she said with a sly grin.

“What are we going to do?” I asked, smiling back, looking demure.

“I have something naughty in mind,” she told me lustfully.  

My heart fluttered in my chest for a moment there. 

“Your house or mine?” I asked.

“My house,” she said. “I am cooking you dinner and then we are going to have some wine and then…”


“I am going to show you what a real woman can do for her man,” Kim told me grinning vigorously.

Kim’s coworker was standing nearby and jokingly told us to go get a private room.  We both laughed. “You two are making me sick at my stomach! You’re are so sappy!” she said.

“I better get back to work,” I told her,  having wasted enough time. “What time tonight?”

“Come over about six,” Kim said. “I will call you when I get off and get dinner started.”

I said goodbye and went back out to finish catching up on the carts before I got off from work.  It took four long strings of carts to push before I had the parking lot empty of carts and ready for Quinton to start his shift.  I gladly clocked out and drove home with a smile thinking tonight might just be the big night Kim and I finally do the old horizontal tango.  I think we are both ready and have waited long enough.  The recent cessation of that medication that was causing my sexual dysfunction was already leaving my system and I felt a longing for Kim like I haven’t felt in years.  I was on fire!

Well, I must get busy mowing lawns.  Two of my regular customers have already called yesterday saying they need their lawns mowed – the petite black lady and her older morbidly obese sister.  I also need to mow my own lawn as well  and will do that afterwards. Business comes first, though.  It is going to be so nice pulling my mower in it’s trailer with my car instead of riding over there to their houses on it many blocks away.  Things certainly are looking up these days.  


This IS The Fun Part! said...

And another day starts with nothing but positive vibes! So nice to hear you looking forward to each new hour!!

I'm sure lovin' this!

glittermom said...

and alls well in the house of Andrew....

Diana said...

Dinner, wine and dancing? (the tango promised) Sounds like a wonderful evening to look forward to. Don't forget your 'raincoat' since she is forcasting rain! I'm happy for you, J!

Syd said...

The horizontal tango--LOL

justLacey said...

A supervisor that appreciates what you do is a dream. I have wished for a job with one like that for the last year and a half. I have exactly the opposite. You are one lucky man and getting luckier every day;)

Jenn said...

Don't forget to buy protection, just in case. You can't depend on the other person to have some. Have a lovely evening :)

Kevin said...

Hahah lucky dog you.

kristi said...

use a condom! :)

justLacey said...

Kristi is in the money. You see it's not just me :)

PipeTobacco said...


Have fun and enjoy yourself.