I had my best AA meeting ever and it was in town of all places last night. We talked of step six, We’re entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character, and I shared about my own trial and tribulations of understanding a higher power and learning to pray. Tons of people came up to me after the meeting to shake my hand and pat me on the back telling me of how my sharing helped them as well.
I picked up my white chip signifying my AA birthday. It was on the 75th birthday of AA. I thought that was fitting for an alcoholic like me. It will be an easy day to remember as I have trouble with numbers and dates. I’ve been meaning to do this for weeks, but was shy of having to go up in front of a room of people.
“You badly need a sponsor,” Phillip, the local AA patriarch, told me after the meeting. “Let me be your temporary sponsor.”
I agreed and now I have a sponsor. I am to check in everyday and touch base with Philip. I explained to him my situation with my father and my lack of money, but if tempted, it is very hard for me not to drink.
“You’ve got to do this for yourself,” he told me. “Your father can’t make you not drink and you can’t do it for him.”
In other news, I got the ball rolling with vocational rehabilitation. I am to call a social worker this morning and set up an intake interview. I am very excited about this and so was dad. We both agreed I need something to do that is positive and life affirming. I need a reason to get out of the bed in the morning. A reason to take a shower and put on nice clothes as I go to my work classes and work therapy.
Well, dad should be here soon. He is going to make biscuits and we are having cheese and scrambled eggs. Today will be the seventh day in a row that I have washed my hair and that is a major achievement. I have also been doing little things like keeping my nails clipped and putting lotion on this terrible skin rash that broke out on my forehead from not taking showers during my medication induced malaise of the past few weeks. So many positive things going on and it is hard to believe I wanted to die just a week ago. I have a reason to live at the moment and it is nice, so nice.