One comforting aspect of George’s drinking over the years was that I always knew I could get a drink if I needed one. I could call George and he would be over in fifteen minutes with a case of beer thrilled to have the old times back. Now? Dad would be more likely to buy me a beer than George. For some reason, this bothers me, and has for weeks. I guess that old saying about you always want what you can’t have is true. The same goes for my Diet Cokes. I never thought much about Diet Cokes in my younger years. I could always just drive to the store and buy some. Now, I am obsessed. I am only allowed six a day (three are caffeine free) and it drives me crazy. Dad and I got in a fight over them last night. He says I get “high” off of them.
Well, this morning I have been researching “hooch” or “prison hooch”. This is my addictive personality at work. Mom is buying me lots and lots of fruit these days and my addictive mind thought, “Hey! I could turn this bounty into alcohol!” Yeast would be the problem. I would have to orchestrate an elaborate ruse to get mom to buy me yeast. I would have to buy buttermilk or milk, flour, baking powder, and act like I was baking things. The recipes are all so varied as well. Some even call for well worn dirty socks or underwear in place of yeast in the “prison hooch” recipes where yeast would be impossible to obtain. Ah, the Internet; where you can find anything if you just know where to look.
Six Miles Under My Belt This Morning…
Maggie and I were passing the old cotton mill this morning when I thought, “You know? I wouldn’t go through all this if it wasn’t for this little dog!” It’s true. I wouldn’t walk if it wasn’t for Maggie. I would be at home ensconced in my warm “command center” reading books, playing video games, or browsing the Internet. I froze my ass off today and kept longing for a pair of warm gloves. My hands were just extremely uncomfortably freezing today.
When I got home, I thought of calling mom and putting into motion getting a pair of gloves today. Putting into motion is a good way to describe it as it would be an elaborate process. But then I decided not to. It would be too complicated and it would get mom in a stir. Mom is obsessive compulsive like me and takes such matters extremely seriously; insanely seriously. She would have to drive by my father’s pharmacy to get a check from my account. Drive to Wal-Mart. Call me three times about the sizes. And then finally purchase me a pair all the while fretting for hours worried if they would fit and if they didn’t having to return them.
Anyways, Maggie loves her walks. I wish you could all see how excited she gets when I pull out the leash. It is like a little kid getting to go to the fabled Disney World every time, and it happens every day when it is not raining. I do it for her, and I guess it is good for me. I used to walk with a passion. A zest. Now? I just go through the motions kind of like having sex after you’ve been married for twenty years.
I Want this Person in my Life…
I’ve been following this woman on Twitter for weeks now. I love her tweets. She’s an incredible person. She writes on Twitter like my favorite blog author wrote on her now defunct blog; everyday mundane stuff that I just eat up. I want to get to know a person and hear about their days. I eat up the minutia of life of someone I’m interested in. I realized a few days ago that I wanted this person in my life and I also realized this was the first time in my life I’ve felt that way before. People have always just chosen to have me in their lives. I have never purposely pursued a relationship this way before. It is nothing sexual. I just want a friend.
Well, I have been commenting on her blog cautiously and tweeting back some. I am not very good at all this so this is an undiscovered country for me. How do you make someone your friend? Is it chance? Or is there some chemistry involved? If she reads my blog then she will probably run the other direction as fast as she can! LOL