I was asked that today by a friend. Not the persona I portray for the world and my blog friends. I still struggle a lot with my mental illness. I hide it from those around me. It is almost as if my parents don't believe me when I tell them. "You seem to be doing so good," they say.
Lately, it is the anxiety attacks. I woke up with them this morning. Last night, it was the sound of rushing water through pipes continuously keeping me company. I didn't even tell my psychiatrist about this latest auditory installment as he would only medicate me further.
But you know what is awesome? The good days. The good days are like the best orgasm. I walk through life smiling, so relieved to have a break in the storm. I smell the air and there is a spring in my step. I want to tackle the whole world and talk to everyone. I want everyone to be happy just like me. And the good days give me a reason to go on. There is life left in me yet.