Thursday, December 11, 2008

Blog Beginnings and Looking Ahead...

One bitterly cold December night years ago I got on the web at my deceased grandmother's house and searched for information about homelessness.  I had been homeless for about 2 months, recently divorced.  I found The Homeless Guy blog.  Wow! Homeless people have websites and people are helping them too!  I quickly realized, though, that this "homeless guy" was a con.  There was nothing to help the homeless on his site.  Only him.  His gift bags for the homeless idea was something for Christian "do gooders" to do when a lot of the homeless wanted burgers, cigarettes, and beer. 

I did start my own blog.  It was called "Homeless and Disabled in Alabama."  Wasn't that just pretentious?  The Homeless Guy listed me on his blog as "The Grumpy Old Man" because I criticized his criticism of getting chicken everyday at the Rescue Mission.  At the time, I would have been so appreciative of any meal not cooked lukewarmly over a fire.  The Grumpy Old Man moniker stuck and I named my next blog after that just to spite the old curmudgeon and he was over a decade older than me. 

Years later, we are both still blogging.  He is about to be homeless again, failing to pay his $150 dollar a month rent.  I think I have grown immensely these past few years and haven't had to belabor my readership with needs and requests for money.  I am still overly dependant upon my parents, but not in a burdensome way.   I am happy most days, content to go about my simple life. I also realized with kindness that the least of "The Homeless Guy's" problems was not having a home.  He has some deep seated emotional problems that no drug or possibly only therapy can fix.  I had to become the better man and be less critical of him.   It was hard, and probably one of the hardest things I have done since writing this blog.  He invites criticism by the way he writes on his blog and interacts with others. 

I thought tonight what I want to be doing next year this time.   Another Christmas will be approaching and I will be going on 38 years old.   My main goal is to be independent and working for someone other than my father.   I realize social security disability can be willy nilly and I can't always rely on that being there.  I also want my schizophrenia to be in complete remission along with these anxiety attacks I am struggling with.  That might mean a second opinion from another doctor.  I will cross that bridge when I get there. 

10 comments:

Eric said...

This was an insightful post and it opened the door again into who Andrew is. I have always enjoyed getting to know you. In the very short time that I have followed your blog, I have seen growth in your life that is staggering. I know there is more to come and I encourage you and pray for you.

Thanks for sharing your life with us.

goinggreenaccidently.blospot.com

PipeTobacco said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
PipeTobacco said...

Sir:

Sorry, I published the above comment here, when I meant it for the next essay.

PipeTobacco

justLacey said...

This post shows so much how you really have grown. I hope you achieve whatever goals you work towards, but in the end I just hope you are happy with whatever comes your way. I think you are doing a wonderful job of growing right before our eyes. You already know how I feel about the homeless guy so I won't go there.

Jay M. said...

Seriously. These are good things to be thinking about, and it's great that you're recognizing your own personal growth and feeling good about it.

I think making goals like that for next year is a great idea, and one that I think I'll start working on. Thanks!

Syd said...

You have come a very long way. And you're doing great. Keep it up. I admire your spirit and desire to be independent.

Kathy said...

You have such a strong sense of who you are and what you want. What a blessing.

Annabel said...

I am so glad that I have known you for so long and that you have shared your new blogs with me. I remember you as the grumpy old man and I often referred to you that way in my blog in my early posts. I am sorry that I haven't posted much in the way of comments in the last few months. I still read every day even if I don't show up in site meter because I now mostly read directly in google reader - thanks to you. I just want to say that I am still happy to be your friend and happy that you continue to blog.

CJM-R said...

It is so good to read you thinking such positive thoughts for your future. You are a great guy and I have always enjoyed getting to know you.

Leann said...

When you write like this I can hear your voice as you put together your thoughts for the post. Well done Andrew. It has been a pleasure getting to know you and watching you grow and heal.

Blessings my friend
Leann