Thursday, October 2, 2008

Vertigo...

I was sitting at a stop light near the interstate this morning.  There were cars all around me.  Suddenly, I felt like my car was moving and the cars around me were moving.  I panicked and pressed the brake peddle as hard as I could.  In realty? I wasn't moving.  It was my mind telling me we were moving.  Then I got motion sickness just sitting there.

The light turned green.  I hit the gas and immediately pulled into a gas station to gather myself.  I scrounged up some change in my car to buy a coke.  I was sweating profusely on a chilly day.  It scared me to death. 

I am still not sure if this was schizophrenia symptoms or just some anomaly.  I dare not tell the doctor or my parents as they will try to take my car away.  It scared me to death, though.

You know?  Joyce would sometimes walk out of her house naked talking crazy shit, I hate God, etc.  Then, she would get dressed and go drive around the Valley while smoking cigarettes and talking to herself.  I used to shudder at her doing so being so crazy, but I now understand how she felt about her car and driving.  I don't want them to take away my car either. 

11 comments:

Gin said...

Andrew, I've followed your blog for a long, long time, but I've never posted a comment. This time, I will, if for no other reason than to reassure you. I don't have schizophrenia, but twice I've experienced the same dislocation you described. And just like you, I jammed the brake pedal into the floorboard certain that I was moving, yet I wasn't. And like you, I broke out in a sweat and became sick at my stomach. Something triggered the initial sense of movement, and the only thing that could straighten me out was getting off the road and getting my feet on solid ground. So just know, it does happen to "normal" people, too. It wasn't necessarily caused by your schizophrenia. Hang in there. You're too good a person to let this get you down.

Jami said...

Andrew, sounds more like a panic attack than schizophrenia ...

Kelly Jene said...

My brother has vertigo and that sounds like something he has experienced. I understand about the car though, during the time when my van was broke down I felt awful without the freedom to come and go.

PipeTobacco said...

Sir:

To me, there are two different, but equally plausible explanations for what happened.

1. It could be a result of vertigo due to an inner ear infection,

or

2. It could be a side effect of some of your stronger medications, perhaps the Kloponin (perhaps the synergistic effect of the Kloponin with your recent injection).

There are other possible causes, of course, but the above two seem the most plausible because #1 is very common, and #2 fits within the scope of the medication profile.

One thing you could consider to help decrease the liklihood of these symptoms returning would be to drink significantly more water to flush your system.

PipeTobacco

Charlotte said...

Andrew, I follow your blog daily, but also rarely post a comment. I, too, want to comfort you. I do not suffer from schizophrenia, but I have experienced what you did, more than once. It's a sensation of moving. When the cars around you are moving, very slowly, it feels like you are moving. I know the feeling of jamming the brake pedal to the floor. It's a frightening thing, but once I realized what was happening, I felt better, but still needed to pull over and gather myself. I really believe that it has nothing to do with your schizophrenia. That kind of sensation can happen to anyone... trust me! Hope you're feeling better about it after reading all these comments of others who have experienced it. Hang in there...

justLacey said...

I agree with Charlotte, it's happened to me too. I think it just freaked you out since it hasn't happened before. Sometimes at work I have to use the microfilm reader and I get terrible motion sickness from it. Also virtual reality rides for me are worse than real rides. My son has some of those car racing games on his Playstation and those make me sick now too. Makes me feel like a dope.

(M)ary said...

hm. those sound like physical symptoms related to perhaps medication reaction? or it could be your body actually reacting to a virus.
Dr Mary recommends orange juice, tea, mild exercise, followed by rest, rest, rest.

Sharon said...

Andrew, please listen to everyone here. You had one of the classic symptoms of vertigo. Something as simple as pressure in your ears or a buildup of earwax can trigger it.It has nothing to do with schizophrenia. But, I can understand why it upset and scared you. I'm glad you shared this with us, so we can reassure you that it's such a common thing, not just YOUR problem, and we're right with you. Hope you feel better now.
- Sharon -

(M)ary said...

you know...i read the comments in detail and the theory that the other cars moving could have caused it is interesting. i have had that sensation that my car is moving because the guy next to me is inching up. after i realize what is going on, i am sooo irriated at the creeper next to me who can't keep his or her foot on the brake for one entire red light.

Kim said...

I agree with the above comments re vertigo. I don't have schizophrenia but it has happened to me too.

mosiacmind said...

Vertigo can be scarey but with reading what people have written it does happen to many people. I have also gotten it like with a panic atack or even when I have not eaten right and such. It can be scarey but I do not think it is anything to worry about. I also have gotten it like someone mentioned from inner ear infections or when something is up with my ears. I hope thta Maggie and you have a good day. mosaic mind.