Sunday, June 1, 2008

Intuitively Handle...

Went to a 10 AM AA meeting this morning.  It was kind of like a somber church for alcoholics.  We discussed handling certain situations in life sober.  Learning how to intuitively handle situations that used to baffle us when drinking.  There is a lot of wisdom in the halls of AA if you have an open mind and listen.  I try so hard to be a malleable soul and alcoholic.  

"Relationships," one lady said. "Drove me crazy and I was always dating the most terrible men.  I got sober and realized I didn't have to complete that vicious cycle anymore.  I had a new freedom in life.  I was at peace with myself."

"Resentments," another man replied.  "I got sober and resented it.  I wanted to drink like my father and his father before him.  It just wasn't fair.  I had to intuitively learn to handle life without alcohol.  It took years and I am still growing and changing.  I learn something new every meeting."

One of my biggest growth points was learning to be at peace with myself sober.  The only time I previously felt at peace was after six or more beers.  My busy, mentally ill mind would go a thousand miles a minute leaving me bewildered and confused.  It took weeks of steady sobriety to calm my mind down along with the help of my medications.

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Joyce's sister came and got her this morning.  Joyce spent all night sitting in a chair on her carport afraid to go inside.  That must have been a long night.  I was oblivious and asleep.  None of the medications they are trying on Joyce are working.  She is still batshiat crazy these days.  I am confused as to why they aren't trying new and different medications.  It is obvious her current ones aren't working. 

There was a note on my front door this morning from Joyce.  It said, "Don't let them take me away.  I love you.  Joyce."  It broke my heart.  I could barely read her handwriting though.  Joyce's living arrangements have been so chaotic with hospitals and living with her sister that it is no wonder she is struggling.    

8 comments:

justLacey said...

Listened to Coast to Coast this morning. There was a guy on discussing being bipolar. Did you hear that one yet?

recoveryroad said...

Fine posting, Andrew. Good work, fella.

impromptublogger said...

Sounds like a very good meeting you went to.

As for Joyce, I have a feeling that they have tried many different medications - some while she was in the hospital. I don't know how many alternatives are left for her but I hope they find something.

Cheryl said...

A very wise post, Andrew. And I'm so sorry about Joyce. I know you really wanted her to be well.

Summer said...

I hope your evening is going well. We had a lot of storm clouds go by, but no rain. I love a good storm during the night. But, I want sunshine during the day. I'm weird like that.

mosiacmind said...

I hope that you have a good evening and enjoy your Wendy's. I really like the double stack from the value menu. Here they are trying frosty shakes and i want to try one but have not yet. wendy's corporate office is in the city where i live so we are the testing market for it and for bob evans. i feel so sad for joyce...i hope that she can get the care that she needs. I hope that you are having a good evening...I have been reading some started a new fiction book...not sure if i like it yet but will read a bit more before i decide.

Leann said...

Good evening Andrew. Hope you are well tonight.

Just got up a few hours ago. It's my Friday...yeah!!

Weather is suppose to be beautiful tomorrow. I'll be out walking and taking pics.

Talk to you later.

Moonroot said...

Excellent post about your AA meeting.
So sorry to hear about Joyce. I hope she gets the medication she needs sorted out.