"It's almost hard to believe you have a mental illness these days," my father told me as I sat in my office and typed away on my work computer.
"Don't tell Social Security that," I replied, smiling, as I turned to face him as I quit typing.
"What symptoms do you have these days?" my father asked.
"I call it a 'busy' mind," I replied. "It is as if my brain is two steps ahead of my body."
"What are your biggest side effects of the medications?" he then asked. "I know they all have some kind of side effect."
"Sexual dysfunction," I whispered, holding a finger to my lips, urging him to keep it mum. "It drove Rosa crazy."
"Sex is overrated anyway," my father replied softly as he left my office to fill more prescriptions.
"Especially, if you never even think of it anymore," I thought after dad left.
In some ways, it is very freeing to not be a slave to all the emotions and urgings an active sex drive can bring on. I've talked to my psychiatrist about it very candidly and he agreed with me. As long as I don't have a problem with it, then he was okay as well. I still can't help but think I am missing out on a part of my humanity, though. It is something we all do and drives so much of what I see in popular culture and society. I realized I always loved Rosa, but I could never lust for her. Am I only half human as well?