I was eating breakfast this morning and trying to think of what to do today. I realized I would be perfectly happy listening to the radio all day and browsing the Internet. I am supposed to feel guilty about this in our productive crazy society. I didn't. I felt resigned to my lot in life. And still. There just is not a lot you can do if you don't have any money. I can't go to a Saturday afternoon matinee, or a meal at Applebee's, or just a burger and fries at McDonald's. I am not complaining mind you. I willfully gave up the money this time around.
I also thought of calling Rosa. "How are you?" I would ask. Most people are flattered by the attention and she would eat it up. I know I would. I was too afraid of rejection, though. I didn't want to leave my happiness today up to the wiles of a woman. And a fickle woman at that. She could have spurned me and sent me into an emotional tailspin. So much of life is a gamble. I just want to draw a 21. Blackjack!
I keep saying I am going to start walking for miles again everyday. I have these grand dreams of being the walking man. We once had this developmentally stunted girl in town that would spend her days walking. She was such a familiar landmark that people would blow their horns and wave as they drove by her. She would wave back and smile. She lost a hundred pounds doing that and was a friend to everyone. I want to by the town's next landmark. To be a friend to everyone. It is not going to happen with me sitting in the house on the computer as I listen to the radio.