Wednesday, January 9, 2008

To Bolster the Heart...

Rosa is so kind hearted.  To have gone through what she went through as an crack addict and a prostitute, homeless and aimless, it is amazing that she has such a good and kind outlook on life.  You would think she would be hardened and surly like many of the older alcoholics I have encountered in A.A.

"Doll," she said over the phone. "Today is fifty days."

I didn't even realize she was keeping up with my sobriety.

"How long have you been sober?" I asked.

"Oh, it has been years now," she replied. "Almost two years exactly."

"I'm very proud of you."

"I am very proud of you, too," she replied. "Let's celebrate by going to a meeting tonight."

"Hopefully, I can pick up my car today and we will go," I said. "I am still waiting on that detective to call."

"How are you feeling today?"

"I feel okay.  I felt shaky last night when Dad was over with my medications.  I had to pace the floor to keep an attack from occurring. I know Dad thinks I am just crazy as hell. He makes me so nervous."

"I love you and will see you in a little bit," she told me.

"Love you too," I said, and hung up the phone.

Relationships can be hard.  Love can be tumultuous.  But I think I've found my soul mate for life (crossing fingers).  I can actually envision myself getting married again some day.  That is something I would have never thought I would entertain. 


SOUL: said...

hope you two have a great night!
congrats to 50 days...

Beautifully Profound said...

Everyone is co-dependent in their own way Andrew. I say it is a natural part of life as long as it isn't something that destroys your life such as drugs or alcohol. But being dependent on Rosa is an entirely good thing. Our natural instinct is for human contact you know. You've got just that in Rosa. She understands you and she loves you most of all. I see nothing wrong with that.



Tee said...

My husband saw the photo of your meal, his comments was, "WOW! Look at that, it looks delicious and only one carb, and two other vegetables, I'm impressed." Have you considered call the detective? Give him a call to see where they are in the investigation and when you can expect to get your car back. Go ahead, you can do it. :-) I'm so glad you are Rosa are back together. You both need each other and that's not a bad thing, we all need someone. I just so blessed to have my soul mate right here beside me.

An Irish Friend of Bill said...

well done andrew. what a nice post.
you are kind hearted too and it comes across in your posts. thats why you are able to recognize the same in rosa.
and dads! yeah. mine drives me nuts too. i dont have your panic stuff, but my dad talks to me in (what I see as) a very patronizing way, because Im sure he thinks i am odd or something because I dont fall into line with tedious family convention of chasing status and wealth for the sake of it. i get the feeling he thinks im a nutter or something even though he never says it. so we gave more in common than you realize!
the only way to not let him drive me quite! so nuts is if I think of him as an aa newcomer. that helps a bit! but as we disagree on just about everything, it is much simpler to try to avoid him. so i can sympathize with you there!

amelia said...

I'm so happy that you and Rosa are together. She's so good for you and obviously loves you.

C.A. said...

I am so proud of your 50 days! And that you and Rosa are back together.