I don't know what it is, but picking up that phone and calling sends my heart to racing. I held the 1-800 number for Alabama Vocational Rehabilitation in my hand as I stood over the phone, picked it up, and listened for the dial tone. I slammed it back down.
"What's wrong?" Rosa asked, walking into my computer room after hearing that loud noise. I was so frustrated.
"I am scared of calling," I said. "I am afraid they won't help me. I am afraid to talk to another person."
"Do you want me to call?"
"No, I just want to get over these fears of the phone!" was my aggravated reply.
I paced the floor some more as Rosa left to go watch some TV.
"You're acting crazy!" Rosa hollered from the other room. "Calm down and lay down!"
I took Rosa's advice and lay down for a few moments. My heart was beating furiously in my chest. It almost felt like one of my anxiety attacks was about to start. I felt better, though, in a few moments. I never did make the call.