It was a foggy morning as I set out for my early morning walk. The fog rolling in off the Chattahoochee river. It was almost surreal walking through that mist as it beaded on my jacket and rolled off. I had been down to see my favorite convenience store clerk and it wasn't a kind meeting. He was trying to entice me into having a beer to feel better. He just didn't understand alcoholism which is common for many.
"Maybe a couple of drinks will make you feel better," he told me as we stepped back to the beer cooler.
He pulled out a six-pack of Heineken knowing it was my favorite.
"Go ahead," he said. "It's on me. A couple of drinks won't hurt."
I thanked him for his kindness as that is what he meant and put the beer back up.
"I have to abstain," I said, not believing I passed up free beer without a dime to my name. "I think it will cause the anxiety attacks to become worse and I become a different person when drunk."
"I'm just trying to help," he said as he smiled.
"I understand," I replied, biting my tongue that he was about to destroy weeks of sobriety.
I quickly left the convenience store wondering if I would ever return. This was such a surprising turn of events. My friend meant well, but was misguided. He thought the beer would calm me and help assuage what has been ailing me.
"I thought alcoholics drank," he quipped as I walked out of the store.
Choose your friends wisely...I thought.
I walked on down to the railroad tracks and sat on the bench in front of the train museum smoking cigarettes. I realized I just can't take a lot going on becoming dizzy with thoughts and desires. Those old urges to drink were in full force and I debated on walking back up to the store to get that beer before my friend got off of work and the chance was lost. Amazingly, I resisted the urge and left the museum to walk on home. Broken glass shimmering like little jewels on the sidewalk as I walked in the lights of the many fog encircled street lamps. I arrived home and ate an apple danish and a glass of milk for breakfast.
Started a new ad campaign this morning. I get to pick and choose which ads I display. Let me know what would interest you. I would appreciate it. I had to talk to a representative on the phone about getting enrolled and setting everything up which was an interesting twist for an ad company. It certainly is overly complicated to put ads up having so many to choose from.