Friday, September 7, 2007

A New Do

I have probably stated this before, but one of my biggest phobias is getting my haircut. I have gotten where I cut it myself and it looks like crap. Well, I have also been wanting to go to church and a nice haircut precludes this. The midday sun was beating down on this little southern town as I mustered up the courage to visit the barbershop.  I got tunnel vision as the swirling red, white, and blue barber's pole came into view. I grabbed the door handle and my life seemed to stop as I walked in and took a seat. Sweaty palms. Palpitating heart. I crossed my arms in self defense. 

"Have a seat in the chair," the barber said.

"Okay," I squeaked.

I took off my glasses, closed my eyes in fear, and let the barber go to work. It seemed like hours had passed when the barber said, "All done," and took off the apron.  I looked in the mirror and looked like a new man. I didn't realize how bad my hair had gotten in the past few months.

"Oh my gawd," Rosa said when I arrived home. "Take off your hat and let me have a good look at you."

I took off my omnipresent baseball cap and Rosa squealed with glee. 

"I can't believe you got up the courage to do that," she said as she hugged me. "I am so proud of you."

"I was so scared," I replied. "He stood so close to me. I could feel him breathing on me."

"Do you think you can do it again?" Rosa asked meekly.

"I wish I had Cheryl to cut my hair," I said tersely of my blogging friend. 

"Oh, don't go on about those online friends of yours," she replied. "You talk about them like you know them."

I laughed.

Much has happened this week. Instead of sitting around and waiting for life to happen, I have been getting out and making it happen.  Bright, sunny days are filled with a bright, sunny mind. Someone had asked on the blog if they thought that AA was making this big difference in me.  I would say God is working through me and making the BIG difference.  For the first time, I have a relationship with a higher power of my understanding and it feels awesome.  

17 comments:

Tee said...

Andrew, GREAT JOB! Hair cuts can be a scary thing, especially if you are letting someone new cut your hair. You never know the results. I'm fortunate I have a great hair dresser that gives me great hair cuts. I suppose we are blogging friends. :-) I so glad you have found an AA meeting that is working for you. I would agree with you, God is working through you and making a HUGE difference. That's what happens when we allow Him in our lives.

Josie Two Shoes said...

Wow - is this really Andrew's blog I'm reading? :) I am just so happy to see you being very proactive in your life! I've read here before about how much you hate haircuts, and to do it so you could look nice to go to church yet - just wow! I'm sure that it was equally fun to surprise Rosa in such a nice way.

Faith - it doesn indeed sneak up on you with new awarenesses when you least expect it. I've been thru many dances with it in and out of my life. About ten years ago I finally figured out how to make it meaningful for me, and now it's a rock I stand on that I won't let go of again. Life without any belief about spirituality can be a scary and chaotic place indeed. Faith is part of the necessary order of things - at least for me. I hope you find what you are looking for there too. It's just nice to see you opening yourself up to possibilities - all kinds of them! Way to go, Andrew!

Terri said...

Andrew? church? :o) wow! Great job on beating that phobia.

CJM-R said...

Sounds like you have turned a corner... good for you!

Thanks for inspiring all of us and also for helping me to become more introspective. We are all more alike than we are different no matter what our individual issues may be.

Peace...

Annabel said...

Amazing Andrew. I am so proud of you. You know I've been praying for you for a long time.

And when you read blogs long enough, you do get to know people. I feel that some of my online friends are the best. I become part of their lives and they become part of mine. I know Rosa can't understand that, but you do and that makes it special.

Cheryl said...

You know I'd love to be the one to cut your hair. We'd be talking and you wouldn't even be paying attention to the haircut. You must feel good when you look at yourself in the mirror.

Anything that makes you happy makes me happy too. This post put a smile on my face.

Summer said...

This post really made me happy for you. Tell Rosa we love her too!

Candleman said...

I love reading your blog and see myself in so much of it. I'm encouraged about this report and hope for you the very best. I have learned that God is able to do his work. We just need to give Him access.

Good on ya man!

My World said...

I hate haircuts too. Hair dressers are scary people. I just am lucky to be able to wear my hair long. :) Good for you that you got through all that.
All the best.

Barb said...

Cheers Andrew! You are in my prayers daily...and I have been reading your blog for 6 months or so!! It is habit forming!

B~

I am glad to be your friend!

Anonymous said...

What a disappointment.
You have just channeled your dependence into another source. What do you really believe?

CRUSTYBEEF said...

I'm so very proud of you Andrew...having faith regardless is a good thing!!

Glad the hair cut went well...how happy are YOU with it though?

So, you wear glasses, eh?

Did the guy wipe down the stranded hairs on the nape of your neck with that silly oversized makeup brush and some cornstarch?

Always,
Crusty~

Moonroot said...

I hate having my hair cut too. It is very overdue for a trim - perhaps I'll take inspiration from you and get it done... It's lovely to hear you so happy. May it continue!

abbagirl74 said...

Perhaps I was the only one to pick up on the comment that Rosa made, or the only one who will comment on it. Yes, YOU DO KNOW US.

C. R. Morris said...

I am so happy to read that you are seeking a relationship with God. Honestly, there is nothing better. Go to church expecting to receive something and you will. And congrats on that new hair do too!

Portia said...

awesome post to tell of the awesome changes taking place in your life. your voice here sounds so strong and happy...that's so cool.
:)

lss said...

I am Lanore Lss521. I am a RN who worked the ER until I was told I was too old and too stressed. I have been working psych for 2 yrs. I think you write very well and get your mood and thoughts around well . You are organized also. I feel my composition is ackward and some what simple. I years of writing on pt records and procedures and policies have decreased my creativity. You have a fear of hair cuts, I have always had a subtle discomfort of the dentist cutting my tongue, Then one night a pt came in and a dentist had cut her tongue. I felt totally justified about my nagging discomfort sitting in the dentist chair. I suppose you have to look at the odds. If you can look at my site lss521.blogspot.com.