I sat down at the river on the banks of the Chattahoochee after lunch. It was a long bike ride from home in the heat. "You've done better lately than you ever have," where the words of my father from last night that echoed through my mind as I sat there. "I try to forget about being homeless and you should, too," were Rosa's words that were also worrying me. Stone after stone was thrown in causing great ripples in the swirling green water that would disappear in the current. I needed to get out of the house and clear my head. I have been experiencing cabin fever thus my recent thoughts of giving it all up and becoming homeless once again.
I then left the river and swung by Rosa's house. She scolded me for my recent actions.
"You seem spacey," she said. "Aloof, like some child dreaming. You always have your head in the clouds."
It didn't upset me. She was right. I have been living on cloud nine lately. If it isn't for the often symptoms of my schizophrenia, I am experiencing a giddiness where I laugh uncontrollably. I am abnormally happy and content if there is such a thing.
"Where have you been?" Rosa asked as she looked out and saw my bike by her front door.
"The river," I said. "I've just been thinking and needed to get out of the house."
A scowl came over her face as I told her that.
"You are going to leave, aren't you?"
"No, I am not."
"You've already left in your thoughts and mind."
I left weeks ago, was my thought at her saying that. I didn't say it. I kissed her goodbye and climbed upon my Schwinn mountain bike to ride home and write this. I do think I am going to start living in my car for a few weeks. Just to get this wanderlust out of my system. It will just be a urban camping experience so no worries. My cool and inviting home with Maggie and Rosa will be just a short drive away if I need it. I am off to start packing up my car to sleep in tonight. I hope you all have a great day.