Wednesday, August 1, 2007

Soft Parts and Dangly Bits

Make no doubt about it I'm into women. The smell and the makeup, the soft parts and dangly bits. Earrings and tight jeans, and all that feminine jazz. Rosa knew I was coming and was ready when I pulled into the parking lot of the apartment complex where her daughter lives. She even had on some lipstick and left a stain upon my cheek which she wiped off as she smiled.

"Just take me for a long drive," she said.

We drove on I-185 in a complete circle around Atlanta as we talked.

"You feeling better about this?" I asked, still worried.

"I'm only staying one week," Rosa said. "My daughter will be bringing me home Saturday morning."

I was secretly pleased, but tried my best not to show it. I wanted Rosa to take time with her granddaughter and daughter to get to know them.

"Is the house okay?"

"I checked on it this morning and your fish are fine. I fed them."

I wanted to blurt out over these pleasantries that I was madly in love. Like some insane maniacal Romeo standing on the street corner and decreeing his emotions for the world to see and hear. The better angels of my nature took hold, though. I didn't want to make Rosa come home too early.

The other night Rosa had asked me the question no man likes to hear: "Do you ever see yourself married again?" Instead of sighing and rolling my eyes, I answered yes. I thought I would never say that for the rest of my life after my first disastrous marriage. But I can see it now. It will be many years down the road, but it is good to know I still have some place in this hardened heart of mine for someone else. The door is open. I just need someone to step in and make themselves at home.


amelia said...

I can't wait for Rosa to come home and to see what happens.

I think you are wise to wait till she comes back.

Summer said...

I know in your life you have all sorts of things to consider before marrying again. But, I see in you such a generous person, it's hard to imagine you not sharing your life with someone.

Sous Gal said...

I am so very touched, happy and even proud of you, FOR you. And for Rosa :)


Diane said...

Opening your heart again is the first step. Six years ago, after a ten year drought following a disastrous marriage, I put the request out to the universe that I wanted a good man in my life. Six months later we found one another and have been together ever since. No it isn't perfect because humans aren't made that way but we are very content with each other and fit together like a pair of comfortable old shoes. When it's right, you'll know it.
Oh, I love your blog. Wonderfully well written.

Pyrate said...

Just found your blog.
I work For a Non-Profit that gives services to Mentally Ill homeless people in California, including teens and young adults. I can see how hard it is to live with mental illness and i applaud you for getting yourself together. That takes an extraordinary amount of courage.

i also really like your blog. It's well written, and i imagine i'll continue dropping by and reading.

well done, indeed.

Tee said...

Good post. How did you enjoy your ride around I-285?

David said...

Good for you dude! Obviously you're still in the game. You just have to take it day by day right? People change, hearts heal, walls come down. This was a nice post to read before bed. :) G'night.

Eric said...

You continually impress me. You obviously are about to burst like a dam during a torrential down pour, yet you continue to think about what is best for Rosa and her family. To me, that is a good sign of love.

justLacey said...

Awww you're a good guy. Soon enough it will be Saturday and Rosa will be back. As for getting to know her daughter and grand daughter...all in good time. It will happen, but it can't be forced. One day she'll just realize that it seems like they have been there all along. I'm glad you made the trip and everything went ok.

Mr.Kim/Mick Bright Kim said...


impromptublogger said...

It sounds obvious to me that she is waiting for a "sign" from you and that she is ready for the next level too.

Congrats and I can't wait to hear how the plunge goes!


awwwwww, this brought happy tears to my eyes.
Thank you again over and over, for sharing with us all your feelings.

Just promise me that when you do marry Rosa, you'll still continue blogging. :)

I tend to get ahead of myself as well, but some people work best in impulsive circumstances-you can't help the way you are-you can only LOVE the way you are.

People in the Sun said...

Hey, that was nice. I even had the soundtrack for your movie going in my head when you two were driving around.