Thursday, July 19, 2007

Formulaic

Formulaic. Certain things just are. Rap songs. They all sound the same to me. I am sure a rap lover would say the same of the Pearl Jam and grunge I grew up listening to in college. I catch it in my writing as well. Something happens and it is so easy to just write in my familiar dialogue style as I remember in my mind's eye what was said. I rarely edit much and most posts only take a few minutes to write so it is the easy way out. I can be a terribly lazy author most of the time. I am working on it, though. When I sit down to write these days, I want to come up with something interesting, introspective, and unique. I want to be creative. Comments on a post are a good way to judge whether something was hit or miss. And it also helps that I am mainly writing anonymously so I can write freely and expressively. I don't have my real name, email, or address plastered upon this blog. I learned that lesson long ago when my cousin googled me and was calling my father and complaining about everything I was writing. She always was the paranoid sort, but she was right. Most people don't stand on a downtown corner crying out to the whole world about their mental illness or drinking problem, or the embarrassing discussion with your doctor that day about m-a-s-t-u-r-b-a-t-i-o-n. "Crazy, I tell you," would be what a bystander would say and the police would soon be along to shoo you away or send you out for a psych evaluation.

What brought this on was that I was just reading this week's writings. These writings, for the most part, are distinctly different from the way I wrote for months about getting to know Rosa or the antics of George and the gang. I have been reaching into the creative grab-bag and pulling out better stuff these days. I think. I know some of you have commented on the positive tone my writings have generated, and yes, this is a reflection of my real life. "Things are better now than they have been your whole life," my father told me yesterday. And he was right. Things are better and I think it is coming out in my writings upon this blog. My only regret? That I hadn't toiled so long and hard on my book without being in the better frame of mind and life that I am in now. Just think of how better it could have been.

Excuse me. I have A LOT of editing to do on a labor of love of mine. My book. I may even start over. I have nothing but time on my hands these days.

14 comments:

Portia said...

i love to see how you grow with your writing. or rather how your writing changes as you grow. if i can keep with it, i hope to see an improvement in my own blog eventually:)
it's great that your desire to drink has waned a bit...i hope it continues. i know you'll never forget how deceptive addictions cane be.
dinner sounds delicious! enjoy:)

2 LMZ FARMS said...

I'm still waiting on the book and the signing. I'm happy to hear that you are doing better and things are looking brighter to you. I've missed you, I have been on a self-pity party ever since the time grew closer for my son to leave for the military. Took me a while to catch up on your life. Have a good one.
Laura

Andrew said...

Portia,

Thanks, I love cooking, but tonight's dinner is going to be devastating for my diet. I've made up the biscuit dough and the chicken is in the oven cooking. All I have left to do is dessert, cook the pilaf, and throw some biscuits into a hot oven. I hope you keep up with your blog and practice makes perfect as they say.

Laura,

I've missed you too. I hate to hear your son had to leave. My brother was in Iraq and it worried us to death while he was gone. Take care of yourself and we will talk again soon.

Pen and the Sword said...

I've been frequently your blogs only very recently. It's funny... I came to blogger to reinvent myself after finding how juvenile and disappointing it was to write over at MySpace, having never really wrote for the public before and loving it. I began to troll the navbar and happened across your blog and loved every word ever since.

I envy you that you have the time and energy to write a book. I'm lucky if I get a short story out once in a blue moon!

I just want to let you know that I have thus far enjoyed your writing. And though I don't always comment, I read nearly every day. Thanks for just being you... whoever that may be ;o) and writing that way.

Andrew said...

Pen and the Sword,

Thank you so much for writing that and thanks for the kind words. I've never tried MySpace so thanks for sharing that. They say all the accomplised authors and bloggers move on to Typepad or Wordpress, but I have been very happy with Blogger. I think this is where I am going to stay as long as it is free.

Andrew

KYRIE said...

Cousins! (:
I have very careful like u about my personal info too but still... If my crazy uncles find my blog, I will be mutton chops in a second.
Bye bye Kyrie it will be.

Annabel said...

I have always thought you are an amazing writing regardless of whether your style has changed or not. You have a wonderful way of capturing life that makes me feel as though I'm a part of it. I am still on awe over you. Thanks for continuing to write for those of us that need our "Andrew fix" every day.

justLacey said...

Next book will be more postitive then. I have noticed your contentment also. I think most people have a lot of turmoil in their young lives and then it sort of settles down as you get older.

Andrew said...

Annabel,

I have always loved your blog because I am obsessive compulsive and you consistently give me minute details about your life. It thrills me to read it everyday. You stoke my inner Monk.

Lacey,

Those were wise words, indeed. I think as well that our lives calm down as we get older. At least, it sounds much more pleasing than the alternative. I enjoyed your comments today.

CRUSTYBEEF said...

I love this new chapter of 4th..I think it's extremely invigorating..
Hope you have a full full belly, a great cigarello and uninterrupted quiet time with Lil' maggie.
Always,
Crusty
Don't you just LOVE that cigarello after eating? ahhhhhhhh..

Mary said...

I happened to find your blog while browsing the "next blog" service. Because I enjoyed the persona you introduced into your writing I began reading every entry without fail. Soon I began reading past writing and I believe I've read everything you've shared on this blog.

I want you to know that it was a wonderful insight. Through your stories and experiences I have come to understand the difficulty my mother must have experienced. I spent years thinking that she didn't even like me . . much less love me even though she said she did. It was too painful for her to go to my high school graduation much less be present to see me receive my degree.

I say this to let you know that reading your experiences has given me a new insight into my mother.

I don't know how your book is written but please don't edit out the real struggle on your journey back to normalcy. Why not end this book with an epilogue and begin a new book with your new life?

No matter, I enjoy your writing, admire you for your strength, and wish only the best for a most deserving man.

Eric said...

Keep up the great writing. It is inspiring in general, but it is of specific use in improving my own writing.

Ogle said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
coastofcalifornia said...

I, too check your site almost daily for my "Andrew fix." (Don't tell my boss!) I hurt for your struggles, am thrilled by your successes (contentment counts as a major success) and always grin at your loving interactions with Rosa. What an extraordinary man you are, Andrew. Thanks for letting me into this little corner of your world. I'm a better person because of it.