Wednesday, July 4, 2007

Can't Please Everyone

One of my posters had commented about that they were no longer going to read because of the "negativity" of my blog. I think that despite a debilitating mental illness, social anxieties and addiction troubles that I am surprisingly upbeat on this blog. I try to rarely write about the constant effects of my schizophrenia and mentioned this to a friend in an email the other day.

On a positive note (and I am not being glib by saying that), I have become fast friends with my next door neighbor. She has a mental illness, smokes and lives on disability. She went to high school with my mother and father and graduated with them. Her name is Joyce. I am just overjoyed to have a neighbor who "understands."

Earlier yesterday afternoon, Rosa and me were sitting on my porch in the swing when Joyce came outside to speak to me.

"Do your medications make you feel spacey?" she asked, standing in her carport.

"They make me feel like a zombie," I replied.

"I can just sit and stare for hours," Joyce said, cigarette in hand. "It worries me."

"I understand completely," I replied.

"We have to take those medications though," she said. "When I don't, I will be up at 3 AM trimming my shrubbery."

I laughed.

"I will be living in a tent in the woods, homeless, with my friend beer," I replied with a smile.

"We don't want that to happen," Joyce said as she turned and went back inside.

"Looks like you have a new friend," Rosa said.

"Yeah," I said. "I think we are going to be pretty good neighbors."

Hopefully, Joyce will start joining Rosa and me on our daily conversations upon my porch over ample cigarettes, cigars, and sodas. I have been truly blessed with people like her and Rosa finding me in life.

28 comments:

Cheryl said...

Sounds like you're settling right in. I love that you're hanging out on the porch. A new friend and neighbor is a good thing. I hope Rosa and Joyce become friends too.
What are your plans for the 4th? I'll be having some friends and neighbors over for a cookout. Hope your day is great!

Summer said...

WTF with the comment?

It's great to have friends isn't it?

Martha said...

I don't think your blog has "negativity." I find it to be a realistic and frank analysis of what it's like to live with a disability. There's nothing negative about that. AND you always include plenty of upbeat humor. That's why I keep coming back to read it!

Pawlie Kokonuts said...

Here's hoping your new friend accepts you, whether you are "negative" or not, or just plain honest. (Speaking of honest, here's a heartfelt SUGGESTED step you might consider for your blog: Instead of mentioning Alcoholics Anonymous by name, respect its Twelfth Tradition by being a little more subtle in celebrating that avenue of help. There are many ways to respect the Tradition while making your point of principles instead of personalities. Plus, it's a creative challenge. All the best; no resentments, please.

Red Robin. said...

You Andrew, negative?!? I'm perpluxed.

You're one of the more upbeat blogs in town.
I'm also very pleased to hear you have a neighbour who lives the life too.

I'm sure it'll be good for both of you.

Keep writing mate. I stil enjoy reading and that's after 4 ish years... Can't remember. Long time...

I think you're crazy just like me said...

I read almost every day, and your blog is about LIFE. I love your blog!

A.J. said...

Don't worry about what one commenter says... This is your blog, write like you want...

Josie Two Shoes said...

What a delightful surprise, Andrew... not only do you have a nice new house to live in, you have a great new neighbor who will undoubtedly become a good friend. You can watch out for each other. Doesn't look like you're gonna be too lonely across town, and I'm glad you are picking up Rosa so you can continue the wonderful times that you spend together. A man with one good friend is lucky, with two he is blessed!

BTW, I never see your posts as negative, just honest, and that's how I like it, and why I can relate.

Deborah said...

A good neighbor is a happy thing!
Glad you have one at your new home.

abbagirl74 said...

Hey booger! I am so happy to hear about your new neighbor! Sounds like you are going to have lots of fun this summer. I hope everything is going well. I read the comment made by that poster and all I can say is that every life has different chapters. You are just on a different page now. Good for you. Have a wonderful and safe 4th of July. It's going to be a grand day!

Ann said...

Just chiming in to agree with all your other loyal readers. Forget the people who tell you that you need to express yourself in a particular way in order to get their approval. Pshaw... You are an interesting guy, and I appreciate you allowing me a window into your life. I am thrilled you get some monetary compensation from your blog efforts, and I "click through" your ads occasionally to do my part. But I don't have any sense that you owe me anything or I am entitled to your words - and should you stop tomorrow, I would just be thankful that you shared for a while - and sad that you were gone.

Just keep being Andrew and if that leads you to telling great stories about Rosa and the gang (and Joyce! looking forward to Joyce!) then so be it. Otherwise, I just wish you well on your journey.

Joshua said...

I totaly agree!

PipeTobacco said...

Sir:

Your writing and your outlook are just the way they are supposed to be... REAL. Ignore the naysayers.

Pawlie Kokonuts suggestion is a little perplexing in my book as well... he/she suggests that not using the name "Alcoholics Anonymous" by name, you are honoring some 12th step. This seems a little daft IMHO. I see no problem with you mentioning the organization by name. I believe the "Anonymous" part is strictly about the individuals not the organization.

So, keep up your grand efforts sir! Have you selected a new type of camera yet? If so, let us know which one.

PipeTobacco

Lynx217 said...

Bah there are good people and bad people in this world. Me and my blog friend Walter both explored this, especially on his blog (you can find his link on my page). Leave the grumpy one behind. Those who don't have depression don't understand. They have no clue how hard it is to remain positive and upbeat sometimes. I'm glad you've found someone so close to you that is going through a lot of the same things. *Hugs* Hope you continue to take all your medicine and find even stronger medicine in your friends.

fiwa said...

Some people just like to be a downer. Too bad that poster felt the need to share the negativity.
Don't worry about it though, that was one poster out of MANY who love your blog the way it is.

I hope you and Rosa have a happy 4th. Are you having BBQ?

SmemanUfo said...

Holy cow. I cannot believe what a mess my comment made. I had absolutely no intentions of implying that you should change your style of writing, nor that you were negative. I simply stated that you currently seem to focus on many the negative aspects of your problems.
I too have been homeless and have dealt with alcoholism so I have a hard time reading your posts from time to time. I may infer more from your writing because I have my own issues that I deal with regularly.

All I was trying to say was that I missed the tales you used to tell, and that even when they dealt with heavy issues, you seemed to have a way of making things seem less imposing. I simply find that your current tales seem to lack something. For me I just miss all of the tales of the people who surrounded you then. Your writing had the ability to bring each one of them alive and I loved it.

I understand that your life has moved on, and I am happy that things are getting better for you. I just have a hard time when you write about wanting to drink again. It's your blog and your prerogative to write what you want. You have done so well, and have overcome so much, I just cannot grasp you ever allowing something as trivial as beer to take it all away.

I had no intentions of trying to offend you, and if I did, then I am sorry. Unfortunately some people decided that I was and read my post in a light that it was not intended. I will allow the door to hit me in the arse on the way out, as someone unkindly stated.

Good luck and good day.

Dana said...

Andrew, we all have our share of 'angst' in our lives. Most of us are just too deeply ingrained with our learned inhibitions to feel fredom to share ours freely and openly with the world as you do. That is the wonderful difference between you and the rest. You are, each and every day, a compelling, honest, pure insight into the trials that we ALL share, and you are brave and self assured enough to put those thoughts, feelings, and experiences into eloquently written words for us, your viewing public, to connect with. Because of your beautifully fluid writing style, reading your blog is not ever a 'voyeuristic' sort of experience (as it is with many of the blogs I frequent)... it is a visceral experience of connectedness to the world (at least in humble opinion). I value your insight and your wisdom. Your daily musings on life is my 'window' into that world. Thank you.
Dana

Sinclair said...

You're not blogging for anyone but you. If someone doesn't like your tone, tell 'em to take a flying leap.

Good neighbours are hard to find.

Be well.

Blue Gardenia said...

I find your blog to be quite positive and genuine. For a person with sz and addictions you are doing great. I love that you wander around town and want to camp out. Exactly my own symptoms.

jAMiE said...

Andrew, i love your blog, the way you write is charming and real and i wouldn't want it any other way...just keep being you and writing the way you do.

justLacey said...

God riddance to the negative commenter. Just one negative comment can really set your day off to the wrong start. Still some people feel the need...

Annabel said...

You're right, you can't please everyone, but there's enough of us that do enjoy everything you have to say. I also think your blog isn't negative... like the others it is REAL. Keep writing about everything just like always.

CRUSTYBEEF said...

That's ashame that the negative commenter had to vocalize their wish never to "step foot onto 4th avenues again." Funny, if he didn't like reading the negative or rather good with bad, than why take his time to post about how he'll not return. That's pretty shrewd, disrespectful and slothful. Sure everyone has a right to their opinion, however, sometimes they should learn to just keep their trap shut.
I'm sorry you had to experience this.
On a lighter note, I'm glad that you have found some "JOY" in your life..hence you're new neighbor, Joyce.
Always,
Crusty~

LAB said...

Who said that I'll kick their tushy! I can't believe that...life (regardless of mental illness or not) is not always upbeat....so I guess they better not visit my blog because lately it has been negative also.

Seems like you have a fast friend in your neighbor there....I'm glad you are being surrounded by good people.

rfp said...

I have been blessed finding this blog. Your honesty is powerful.

shy_smiley said...

Dear Andrew: Maybe you've lost one reader because of your negativity, but he's one reader and commenter you're better off without. For the record, I don't think you're the least bit negative. Some days life gets you down more than others, and your writing would ring hollow if you didn't acknowledge the bad times as well as the fine times. Keep on truckin, dude. I love your blog.

austere said...

Andrew, very nice about Joyce. I think very nice about the rest of the town looking out too, but that is my opinion...:)

darla said...

Andrew, it was so nice to click on your blog and find you here again! I've missed reading about your life's adventers. Pay no attention to the "negative" reader! Look how many "positive" readers you have! Yea! I'm so glad you have a nice neighbor with whom you have something in common with! Great! Keep up the good work, Andrew!