Saturday, June 30, 2007

Temptations Abound

I sat down at the railroad tracks in the hot sun upon my favorite perch behind the bank before lunch. I was entertaining wild parties to be thrown when my big Adsense check gets here in a few days. I want to just pitch my tent in the woods and spend a couple of weeks drinking copious amounts of beer and listening to the weather band of the radio completely sequestered away from society. Can you tell I am struggling today? The better angels of my nature are on vacation.


C.A. said...

I wish you peace today, Andrew. Keep fighting the good fight. No matter what the temptation, please remember were all out here pulling for you, if that is any comfort.


Cindi Ann

VA Friend said...

I just got my Adsense account up and running finally. Thanks to your and your blog I learned all about how to set it up and the benefits from it.

Keep on writing and blogging, you never know when it will help others as it has helped me.

When I am on your blog I click on the ads for you. I hope it helps. I am surprised after only two days with my account how the pennies add up. If you ever get over to my blog, click an ad or two for me too.

Take care,

Blue Gardenia said...

Wanting to isolate in nature can be viewed as spiritual or a symptom of mental illness. Drinking copious amounts of beer is an addiction and self-destructive no matter how you look at it. Make a camp site out of your backyard and stay off the sauce. Wandering into town at night by the cottonmill or watching trains can fullfill the nomadism of Schizophrenia without becoming a hermit and/or degenerate alcoholic.

Cheryl said...

I'm hoping to see lots of pictures posted on your blog taken with the new camera you'll buy with your Adsense check. I'm sorry to hear about today's struggles and hoping tomorrow finds you in better spirits. One day at a time.

Moonroot said...

Hope you can find a way to gain the peace you seek without risking the destructive influences of alcohol. May tomorrow be easier on you.

~Vital~ said...

Andrew, I'm pulling for ya. keeping you in my prayers. I have great hopes for you. You know, you see life, "real life" more vividly than any other person I know...What a gift. Most of us just walk right on by. I've started taking way more picyures of things lately. Mostly with my camera phone as it is with me all the time. It is helping me to view things better, maybe one day I won't always need a lens to see it.

Eric said...

"Calling all angels! Vacation is over. Your assistance is needed for one who is fighting the good fight."

Rae said...

Andrew, on page 417 of the AA Big Book, it says ... "Acceptance is the answer to all my problems today." If you read that whole paragraph you will find that there is an answer to help you with your struggles.

You are in my thoughts, and I know what struggles feel like. It's understandable that with the move, all the changes in your life, your disease would call to you.

You will make it ... just keep going to those meetings and keep writing.

Blessed wishes,


Summer said...

I have faith in you and I truly admire you for your tenacity. I wish I had an ounce of it.

fiwa said...

Keep fighting Andrew. Call Wanda and ask her out to lunch or something. And like Cheryl said, just think of that lovely camera you're going to buy.

Be strong, I have faith in you that you can do it, even though it's hard as hell.

Hope you can find some peace today.

~Vital~ said...

Andrew, my daughter gets her 1 month chip this week. hope your doing ok, you haven't posted in a day or so. I'm keeping you in my prayers.

PipeTobacco said...


Since it is atypical for you to not post for two days in a row... I suspect people will begin to worry.

I hope that things are going well for you, and that you are enjoying your new home.

1. If you have gone "urban camping", I hope that you are being careful... and that you are camping because you ENJOY it, not because you want to hide from some worry or fear.

2. If you have "gone off the wagon" so to speak, I am hoping that you have done so in a moderate, manner and have not purposefully positioned yourself in a manner that your father is going to reign you in even more tightly.


amelia said...

Pipe Tobacco said it all perfectly!

Nana said...

Andrew, remember how far you've come. Concentrate on winning each day. I haven't joined in the "chirp" before but have been following your blog for several weeks. I picture you as a wonderful, talented young man who has much to offer. May your guardian angles enfold you in their wings of peace and carry you through these bad times. Yes, I think we are beginning to worry that you haven't posted. Give us a "Hey, Y'll" even if you don't feel like writing.

fiwa said...

Hey Andrew, let us know how you are doing.

Sending you love,

SmemanUfo said...

I wish you well Andrew, but I have to give up on reading your blog any longer.

I started reading you last year when you were working in the produce department, and many of your stories were about the odd assortment of characters that hung out there. I really enjoyed your style and loved all of the odd tales.

As of late though, you seem to have given up writing about what made your blog so special to me. These days your tales just seem to be about your struggles with addiction and mental issues. I guess I am just tired of seeing you dwell on all of this negativity, and neglect your true talent about writing tales of the oddballs that populate many small towns.

I hope you get help and overcome your personal demons, but unfortunately you will just have one less reader to deal with.

Take care, get better, and find that simple joy that you used to write about so eloquently.

barefoot 303 said...

Dear Andrew,
I wish you the world of peace today. I will be carrying you in my thoughts. I for one am not giving up on your blog. I find that sharing our difficult times as well as our happy ones, help everyone, especially the one writing, so keep it up. Know that you have created a caring community here on your blog for you. I hope that in times of trouble, you can come here and read all the positive thoughts others are having of YOU, just YOU and no one else but YOU!!! Lots of folks are on your side and I hope that gives you strength to fight the fight you struggle with.
Thank you for being in my life.
aka, Jennifer

mago said...

Anybody home?

Grad007 said...

I enjoy reading your blog, no matter what the topic!

Lately I've come to better understand how hard you struggle. Keep fighting!

Hope to hear more news from you soon,


Portia said...

Hi Andrew,
It's true, you do have a way with conveying personalities and characters through your words, but that is not all I get here. You teach many lessons, from how hard it is to cope with addictions to how easy it can be to soak up the simple beauty of life.
You have had a LOT going on lately. I imagine you will post again when you feel like it, meanwhile you are carried in the thoughts of so many.

Melissa said...

I am very worried about you. You have not written in days and I grow strength by reading about the jourenys that you take. I was reading several of the posting and I would have to say that I agree with some of them. You are a special person to me even though I do not know you personally. Please try and look at the brighter light and not down the darks of the days.
How about that book? Could you be almost done with it? I would love to buy a copy. What about the new camera? I love looking at the scences that you take because I do not stop to look at them myself so I rely on you to help me see the beautiful nature.
As I was reading one of the post it made me very upset. Some wrote on how they read your posting years ago and they are now going to stop becasue of your blogging types. Do they not understand that is who you are and you do not need them you have many other readers like myself and others.

KEEP your head up to the sky because the sky is much more beautiful than the ground.


abbagirl74 said...

Well, I for one, am not worried about you. Pick yourself up and start over. Don't worry about the hurtful or negative comments you may get. We all get them. You will get one out of 100. We love you. We support you. Now get yourself back up and start living. Did you hear me? START LIVING!!!! You can say this is your kick in the pants for the time being. I have always looked up to you and you know you mean the world to so many. What's it going to be?

abbagirl74 said...

Please read my post this evening. Stay strong.

Josie Two Shoes said...

Andrew, I am taken aback by someone who would try to tell you to what to write or not write on your blog! What audacity! If you don't like what you read here folks, don't stop by, but you don't need to post negativity. Who needs that? We all blog for our own benefit and therapy, as well as for the entertainment of others. Life IS about ups and downs, starts and falls, not only for Andrew, but for all of us. Write about whatever is real for you Andrew, I for one, and it looks like many, find all that you share very valuable. And don't worry about disappointing us if you slip, start over tomorrow. One day at a time, remember? That's all we can do. We're pulling for you! Hope to hear from you soon.

~Vital~ said...

Exactly Josie, I couldn't have said better my self other than to tell the disappointed reader, not to let the door hit him in the "arse" on his way out.

darla said...

Andrew, you have lots of friends out here that are willing to "help you pick yourself back up" if need be. Hopefully, you're just enjoying your new house or camping with nature.
But all of your true reader-friends are still here anxious to hear from you! Hope all is well! Come on, talk to us!
We care about you, Andrew. Hang in there...