Saw the Celtic beauty at my A.A. meeting again tonight. These meetings are in another town (quite a lengthy drive) and are much more liberal in scope. I like them much better than the extremely conservative meetings in my small hometown.
“I am struggling with the issue of a higher power,” She said, sharing during the meeting. “I feel I should take responsibility for my addictions and not just give them away to some mythical being in nether land.”
Ah, a woman of my own heart. You could feel an air of uncomfortableness go around the room, though. We live in a theocracy after all and even A.A. doesn’t escape the rabid religiosity of this country much to my chagrin.
The meeting then ended with several people coming up to talk to her about what she shared trying to reassure her that religion was the key to sobriety. I caught her as she left the Old Catholic church that was now the meeting hall and she was walking to her car.
“I use the A.A. group as a whole as my higher power,” I told her as she turned to look and see who was speaking to her.
“Hey, that’s a good idea,” she said, smiling warmly.
“I have trouble with the whole God thing and higher power malarkey myself.”
“I guess it is how you are raised,” she replied as she stopped walking to talk to me in the parking lot. “I just wasn’t raised in a religious family. We never went to church and my father taught us to question authority, especially that of religious figures.”
“I grew up the same,” I told her. “My father was rather irreverent about the whole idea of religion as well.”
I walked her to her car and noticed there was no wedding ring on her finger. My heart leapt up into my throat at such a fortuitous happenstance. She is just absolutely, stunningly gorgeous.
“Will I see you at a meeting here tomorrow night?” she asked, unlocking her car door. “I noticed you don’t come much.”
“I live in a town nearby and just come up here on occasion for a change of pace,” I replied, overjoyed that she wanted to see me again. “I will certainly see you tomorrow night.”
She smiled warmly again and got in her late model Toyota to drive home. I haven’t been this mesmerized by a woman in years and wanted her so badly and I barely even know her. “Baby steps,” I told myself as I walked to my CR-V to drive home. Baby steps, indeed…