You say you have social phobias and social anxiety, and yet your life is filled with people and interactions. Please help me understand, a person wrote today. You have a vibrant social life.
Have you ever noticed who I hang out with? All people with little social standing outside our own little clique. I am not very far up the social totem pole.
A person had written me an email not too long ago saying they know how I feel. They felt more comfortable hanging out with social misfits, street people, homeless people, and drunkards. I feel the same despite coming from a locally socially prestigious family. I feel like a duck out of water when I am thrown within the social confines of my father’s friends.
With George, Big S, Rosa, and the gang, I feel comfortable. They accept me for who I am limitations and all. I could be the biggest fall down drunk and George would still be my friend and be a part of my life. I could talk to myself constantly crazy while un-medicated and Rosa would still want to sleep with me and have something to do with me. I could be homeless and Dumpster Diving Dan would embrace me, faults and all, and teach me the tricks of the trade of surviving off the trash of the rest of society.
That’s why I feel so comfortable and at ease around such people. The gang is a very unassuming bunch. Throw me into a mix of my father’s friends and I am an awkward, bumbling, social idiot that stammers upon his words and who would rather be in hell than such a situation. I guess it can be hard to understand and even harder to explain.