Friday, February 23, 2007

The Power of Money…

“Money is power,” My father told me over the phone today. “That is one thing I have learned from owning a multi-million dollar business.”

“I know,” I said plaintively as I thought of the paltry $11,000 dollars a year I live on.

We had gotten on the subject of lawyers and the ease with which my father will pay for and use them. My recent debacle with a credit card company was easily thwarted by my father’s lawyer. They wanted third party arbitration. In the fine print of the agreement, you had thirty days to write and request a judge to decide and forego arbitration. I would have never known this without the help of my father’s lawyer. The credit card company dismissed the supposed $278 dollars I owed them on a card I never used. It would have been far more costly for them to go to court. Without my father’s money, I would have never been able to afford a lawyer. I would have owed that company the money and they could have easily garnished my monthly check for the amount.

“Hindsight is 20/20,” I told my father speaking of my rash decision in applying for that credit card. “I will never do that again.”

“Well, I now have power of attorney over you and can handle all those things,” He replied. “You didn’t mean any harm.”

Nothing has worried me more (paranoia) than this whole power of attorney thing. I am doing okay at the moment, but I never know what tomorrow may bring as far as my mental illness is concerned. My father could easily have me locked away in some psychiatric hospital now if things turned for the worse. I am placing, in his trust, my very future and life.

“Promise me you will only do what is best for me,” I said with great affliction in my voice.

“What did I do for your brother and sister?” He asked.

“You saw them through medical school and told them what do,” I replied.

“I am telling you now to take your medications and to never drink again and you will be okay,” He said sternly. “I will see about you.”

I hung up the phone after saying goodbye and sat in the deepest of thoughts. It is still just damn scary. Addictions are so unpredictable. My father is a rabid teetotaler.

One day at a time, I thought as I sat there scared. At least I am no longer homeless.

My thoughts were of little consolation.

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PipeTobacco said...


So, it is now a done deal? He gets to call ALL the shots? Somehow, that makes me uncomfortable.


Red Robin. said...

I hope this comment finds you feeling better Andrew.

I'm sure, that beyond the body, somewhere, there's a part of us that just watches the journey and feels the experience.

Similar to riding a roller coaster. We're not physically rolling around ourselves, but we're sat in something that is. We get to go through the experience though. 'if often wonder if at our life's end we simply get to get off. All being completely fine and well.

I enjoy your camping stories. Hope it was what you needed mate.

Rich said...

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Rich said...

On a different note:

I have to question if AA endorses the sale of products.

Cheryl said...

Your unease is understandable. That said, your dad does want the very best for you, and he is on your side. I hope that your fears never come true.

Have you had dinner with your mom lately? I need you to describe one of your delicious meals.

chumly said...

17 years sober and I am the same way sometimes. I joke about my addictions but after I got sober, I found true friends, as they say priceless.

destinationtwilightzone said...

wow, I certainly can understand your concerns, I'm bipolar and for quite a few years I refused to take my meds which eventually landed me in my favorite hospital twice a year. Good luck to you. And btw exactly what town? I grew up in south central alabama, Luverne to be exact which is in crenshaw county, right below montgomery county

Grad007 said...

Hi Andrew,

Is it possible for your father to have power of attorney over you in fainancial matters, but not medical ones, if you're worried about him locking you away? (Although I think he can't do that without good reason, such as the recomendation of your psychiatrist.) Perhaps your brother or sister could be your attorney instead?

I've heard you should discuss with your attorney what you'd like done in the event of a particular situation, so that they're well informed as to what chioce you would have made. I thought that was the function of power of attorney; The attorney should choose what you would have chosen, were you able to.

Perhaps your therapist can help you to change who in your life has power of attorney in what situation?

Grad007 -

Summer said...

Most POAs have a revocation clause. I hope yours does.

austere said...

That's a tough one. Maybe its a cultural issue, but I think your father wants what is right for you. I don't see anything wrong in that. Maybe a sibling can also be required to agree, with a list of specific circumstances?

Jay M. said...


I have to say I'm a little more than disappointed with the level of comments on this post. You are living with schizophrenia, and doing a damn fine job of it. Partly because you take your medication and stay away from alcohol.

Your father has raised a son who, after 20 years or so, developed symptoms of schizophrenia. He has loved you, cared for you-financially and emotionally, and you have to remember, that he's dealt with you too. It's not easy to be in constant battle with someone who, at their worst times, may not know what is best for themselves.

Your dad loves you, and only wants you to be safe and happy. When you get down and out, and are in the worst of ways, your parents are the ones who picked you up and made sure you were safe.

He only wants to be able to do the same if for some reason something really bad happens to you. If for some reason you put yourself in a situation where your life is in danger, or other people, or some other crazy circumstance, your dad just wants to know that he'll have the power to make sure that you're safe. That's all a loving father wants for his kids.

The rest of you should be ashamed for thinking otherwise.