Friday, January 26, 2007

Lunch with Wanda…

I looked at my hair in the mirror of the car using my hand to rearrange it. I had just pulled up into Rodger’s parking lot.

“You are not on a real date, stupid,” I told myself. “You are just going to talk A.A. stuff and eat lunch.”

Still, I didn’t want to look like I just crawled out of the bed and I did. I couldn’t get my hair to do anything.

“Screw it!” I muttered as I reached for my baseball cap on the passenger’s seat and put it on.

I walked into the restaurant to find Wanda sitting by a window near the back. My social anxieties surged. Beads of sweat broke out on my forehead. My hands felt clammy. She turned to look at me and waved me over as she smiled. I felt as if everyone in the busy restaurant was watching me. I took a seat at the table.

“I was beginning to think you weren’t coming,” She said.

“Sorry,” I replied. “I am running a little late.”

“What are you having?”

“I think I am going to have two barbeque sandwiches and an order of fries,” I replied. “You get whatever you want. I have a tab here.”

Soon, the waitress arrived and we ordered our food. The waitress disappeared into the kitchen to place our order. There was an awkward silence as we both sat there for a moment. I looked out the window watching the cars pass on the busy highway and the many patrons coming to and fro from the convenience store across the street afraid to make eye contact.

“I don’t bite,” Wanda finally said breaking the silence and captured back my attention.

I smiled.

“I know,” I said. “You have to forgive me. I can be awkward in such one on one social situations.”

“You don’t act like you are,” She said. “You have such a pleasant speaking voice and seem so sure of yourself.”

I touched my finger to my temple and said, “It’s all up here.”

She laughed as she leaned across the table and quietly said out of earshot, “Honey, I am a little loco myself. I don’t think we could have drank like we have and not be a little crazy.”

Her saying that completely disarmed my social phobias. We sat for over thirty minutes after eating talking about A.A. and the various aspects of the program. She also has two dogs and we got on that subject as well.

“I expect you to have a sponsor in a few weeks,” Wanda finally told me before I was ready to head home and she had to go back to work.

“I will try,” I said halfheartedly with a lukewarm and uncomfortable smile.

The waitress brought our receipt and I placed a tip upon the table. I and Wanda got up to walk out of the restaurant.

“Let’s do this every week,” Wanda said.

“I would like that,” I replied. “I feel comfortable around you.”

“It’s just my charming personality and alluring wit,” Wanda said facetiously.

We both laughed. She gave me a hug and I drove home with a full stomach and a big smile on my face. My therapist told me that just enduring these social avenues would help me overcome my fears and she is right. It gets easier every time I try.


Augs Casa said...

sounds like you had a good lunch with Wanda. Kudos to you for getting out and having lunch with her.

SimplyTim said...


Terri said...

Andrew, I think any of your blogger friends here would love to be in Wanda's shoes and enjoy a weekly lunch with you. It seems to me that the people you associate with get as much from you, as you do from them, in fact they may crave your company as your blogger friends crave your updates! Have a great weekend!

Angel said...

Wanda sounds like a great woman! I'm glad she puts you at ease. She might be really good for you!

So, do you not have dinner with your mom Thursday's anymore? I read that in your COC and have been looking forward to a post about your conversations...

amelia said...

Probably one of the best things you could have done!!
Keep up the good work.

Amanda said...

I know how hard it is to get out of one's comfort zone... I'm really happy for you for doing it. :)

RICH said...

sometimes it's such hard work to get out and meet others. But it can be rewarding as you found out. Stick with it dude!!

M said...

Super Cool!!! (-:

Summer said...

I could picture it all in my mind's eye. You do have a beautiful and comforting voice. A lunch with you would be a pleasure for anyone.

Cheryl said...

It's like what they say about smiling. Just the act of doing it can make you happy. I often paste a big smile on my face before going to sleep. People would think I was losing it if they saw me!

abbagirl74 said...

I am so glad to hear it went well. I thought about it today as I was lugging my vacuum down the stairs. Of all places! I thought, "I bet Andrew is having a good time right now!" Good for you sweetie!

Grammy said...

Thanks for that link to NARSAD, a very cool Web site.

chumly said...

Did not anyone ever tell you what you SAY at WANDA's is suppose to STAY at WANDA's. You need a new sponser.

Leann said...

Baby steps Andrew, baby steps.

It sounds as if you had a nice lunch with special lady.

Kristen said...

I am glad it went well and that you had a comfortable, enjoyable time. Thanks for sharing. I will look forward to next week's lunch!

austere said...

She IS seriously funny, eh? That alluring wit line had me laughing laoudly.