Sunday, December 17, 2006

Things begin to look up…

I feel much better this morning after getting a three mile hike in. I headed out spring road and walked half way to the end and turned around and walked back. It was a beautiful albeit cool morning this morning. I got to experience my first magical hour in a long time as dawn arrived. The magical hour in winter is so subdued compared to summer though.

Yesterday evening, I did manage to hike 7 ½ miles before dusk. I just feel better if I get out of the house for my daily walks. I just cannot escape the paranoia that I am being watched though. As I walked into downtown towards the train tracks yesterday evening, I came upon a little black man who cussed when he saw me come around the corner at the furniture store. I think I scared him as I was walking very fast. I just think I look weird and he was cussing at seeing me. God, I am so crazy. A little occurrence like yesterday sends me into a tailspin. It was all I could think of for the rest of the day.

Today marks two weeks cigarette smoke free. I think I am in shock at being able to stay away from cigarettes for so long. I was such a heavy smoker. I am very proud of myself for hanging in there. Yesterday was hard though. I wanted a cigarette very badly yesterday afternoon. Smoking always helped pass the time for what can be very long days for me.

It is hard to believe it is December. The temperatures have been getting into the mid seventies everyday this week and will do so well into next week. Our little Indian summer has proved a welcome respite from the doldrums of winter. I wish Mother Nature would make up her mind though. It has been years since we have gotten any snow here and I was hoping for at least one winter weather occurrence this winter season. The weather in the winter South can be so boring most years.


Kristen said...

Hey, they fixed it! C'mon back all you bloggers. :)

Things are indeed looking up for all. Great news, Jonathon, about getting out and feeling better. Yes, there are crazy things going on in your head, but you do have a good grasp of when to ignore them and just get on with it.

Congratulations on sticking with no smoking! You are an inspiration.

Rebecca said...

I'm glad to hear you are feeling better. I realize that you are taking a lot of medications, but also be aware that extreme tiredness and fatigue are common for the first few weeks of giving up smoking. Your body isn't getting that constant kick of nicotine/stimulant that its used to. That part does go away, it just takes awhile. I really do wish you well with it. I've been there/done that and although its one of the hardest things I have ever done, it IS worth it.